english
svenska

Me and You
and We
and by the way

long distance poetry - part 1

written by Mikis Mazarakis
photography by Richard Seah

you

yes, you

no, not someone else,
you.

exactly,
you
who
are reading
right now
here and now

that‘s right,
you

only you

i would like to ask:

how are you?

what are you up to?

and how do you like
that which you are up to?

earlier today
i sent a little star up into the nightsky

it will arrive in your
nightsky
tomorrow
afternoon

you‘ll catch it
by looking up
very up

up up,
that’s where you will find it

but you won’t be able to see the star
it’s not visible

it‘s special

it‘s from me,
to you

you will sense
the star
if the sensation of it
is what you desire

if you want the star to have existence
then you’ll be able to pick it down
from up there
up very up there

this isn’t done by stretching your arm
and not by stretching your thought

it is required that you stretch both
at the same space
and time

hand and thought
thought and and

once you have caught the star
you may put it in your pocket
or in your heart
or next to
your ear
and listen
if it has something to say

or,
you can throw it back up
into the nightsky

it is yours

do with it what you like

i would, however, recommend
that you give the star
at least a few hours

trying to get to know it
because this star
- as I said -
is a star special

if you show the star to someone else
this else will probably say
that it doesn‘t exist
and else will probably right
because the star doesn‘t exist -
not to anyone else

it only exists
for you
for it was you
that it was to

and what makes the star so special
is that you’ll never be able to see it
and yet in it
you will find everything
everything
that you wish to find
in it

 

you,
by the way,
where do you live?

and you,
are you pleased
with your live?

 

in a few days i will move
to the big city down there
the city over there,
you know,
the city not so far
from here

 

i hope that i will have a wonderful spring
and that you will have a wonderful spring
as well
and a swell
summer
and fall
and winter as well

if you want to feel
free
and if you want digital
contact with me
then write to me
with ones and zeros
and if you want material contact
with me
then you’re welcome to come
to the there
to the city over there, not very far
from here,
you know

by the way,
i have opened a new store
a nice, amazing and very well assorted
farewell store

in it you can find every kind
of farewell that there is
to be found

a hug, kiss, touch, wave, blink & tear - a finally & not a day too soon - an i’ll miss you & please take care -
all of this,
among much else,
can be found in my stupendous
farewell store
and the best part is that everything
in my mindblowing farewell store
is for free
is for the free -
one can just take
whatever one wants

 

what do you want?

 

and you,
do you know
what I believe?
no?
well,
here it goes:

i believe that we will whisper
when all the words in the world
will flow like water

we will whisper
when the only words in the world
will be those
that flow like water

you,
you know,
i wonder
how does your time
smell?

mine smells wells

not completely captivating
but okey
kind of like nutmeg
but not cinammon

 

since a few days back i have felt an increasing need for reflection
and silence

therefore
i spend a considerable part of my time these days
reflecting
and silencing
more than usual

do you like silence?

 

it feels very good to leave this city to
morrow, as if this chapter is over

time to start a new
but before i do
i would like to collect
that which i have scattered
and ponder upon
my bond to this pond
and why it is so unfond
and then i’ll say bye bye,
now i‘m gone

the last few days
have for this reason contained
less music than usual
less street
less wheat
but not less wine
since nothing can be lesser
than nothing

 

how is your mother, by the way?
do you have a mother, by the way?

 

sunglasses,
i bought two of them
yesterday
and they are not
malfunctioning

there‘s been so much
squinting going on lately

squinting to such a high degree
that i believe that i have had
an angry look
but look,
i have not been angry it is just
that my facial muscles have been forced
to work
too much
too hard
too long
to
two
2.

today i will try to find
a rolling friend
a bicycle, un velo
i need one of those

after that i will try to find a place
where i can live

i need a place to live

i wonder if people who have no place
don‘t live
?

do we have to find a place
in order to live
?

 

last night
the moon put on a breathtaking show

i celebrated by eating honeydrops

 

the last week before i came here
it felt like potatoes were being mashing in my head

i had seventeen balls in the air
and my six hands were not enough
to make them stay there

but yesterday i slept well,
many times
and well,
i slept the magic sleep,
you know,
the magic sleep

i‘ve been missing you.

my body, and everything in it
and everything not
in it
has been trying to get a hold
of something youish
but hasn‘t found more than air
and has therefore
been forced to find satisfaction
in the thinking of you,
which is the reason you have been forced to run
very much, in my thinking, among neurons
and synaptic connections

who are you, by the way?
are you someone, by the way,
or are you no one?

or are you by the way?

and you, by the way,
how are you doing?

as for me,
i feel very well

on a day like this
a gray day
and i say
hooray
and I say,
would you like to play
a game of chess?

when i feel well
i like the game of chess

who won the game of chess?
is a question often heard

both
should be an answer
equally often heard

i have a suggestion:
today
we shall sing a song
whistle lullaby
jump a rope
and hope that our jumping
somehow
gives gold to our eyes -
your eyes and mine

i have one more suggestion:
today,
let us find a spot
where wild diamonds grow
up on a field
behind the mountains through which flows a river
over which stretches a bridge
on which walks a donkey
working
pulling
making
money
because without money
empty is belly
empty is day

without money, one doesn’t get around
with money one gets around
or no,
by the way,
with money one doesn’t get around
and without money
one gets around
and i want to get around
a problem
consisting of a leaf
falling
very slowly falling
and there is an elephant
standing on this leaf
while it is falling,
very slowly falling

and i wonder
how is it possible that an elephant can stand on this leaf
falling
very slowly
falling?

and i believe that
either the elephant very light is
to be an elephant
or the leaf very strong is
to be a leaf
or perhaps i,
who am watching,
observing,
am moving in the light of speed
or perhaps the elephant and the leaf,
and this i find quite reasonable,
only exist in my mind

and my mind
is so kind
so free
it makes me
free
it takes me
out of a cage
and gives me wind
to fly
soar from die
fly like a fly
and by the way,
do you have a fly
or don‘t you
like to fly?

i recently came to a town
after a long day‘s journey
towards the end of the night

on the way here
i saw a moon, a fire,
a boat and the seats
in the bus
were not soft

on the way here
a question popped up
said: “look at me”
and i looked at it
and I was told
to pass it on to you

which is what i am doing
now:

would you like me to come and pay
a visit
to you
over there where
you are you

just a couple of days
in the beginning of next month,
how does that sound?

i can bring two cakes
one for you
whoever you are
and one for me
whoever i are
and then we can have a party
a hoorayparty
for ourselves
whoever we now, then and will are

did you know, by the way,
that we
are a community of communities

you, me, he, she, together are we, a community
and you, me, he, she, everyone, every one, in his or her self, is a community

you, i have a question:
are you confused or is everything crystal clear?

as for me,
i would say that i am not confused
but neither am i crystal
clear

when i am unclear,
when i can‘t make up my mind,
i like to look,
twist, turn,
leave space
for hesitation
reflection
and hypothesisization

and then
when
i feel that i have accomplished as good as i can
with the hesitation, reflection and hypothesisization
i usually make a decisision
which kind of makes the un depart
from the clear

after that
i follow the decisision
and i follow it until
i find reason for revision
whereupon the reflection
and hypothesisization
is resumed,
i assume

what is your method
when you are not
crystal clear?

i try my best
with my decisions
and with the following
of them

i firmly feel
that as long as i can look myself
in the river
and honestly say
that i tried my best
i very rarely get scared

are you scared?

if yes,
of what?

if no,
hold on to the flow

 

fear
was once
a big part of my life
but for various reasons
this has changed

even though there’s one thing
that still scares me
and that is fear,
it kind of makes me stop

 

in my life
i have gotten to know pain
and i don‘t feel like dwelling
on the details - not here -
but in short i can say
that the reminiscence
of this pain
awakens something
that i don‘t want
to be awakened

 

someone told me that you might be going to canada

is it possible?
or is it probable
or is it unthinkable
or perhaps unbelievable
that you are going to canada?

 

if you‘re really going there
i hope that canada will treat you well
and in case you like to paint,
that the paint
will be nice to your eyes
and the color white
by the way
has come to fascinate me,
it seems to whisper something that i can‘t hear
but it sounds nice
and my new city, by the way,
is also nice
and kind
and kind of angry
sometimes
and in some places heavy,
many searching eyes,
and they’re not searching for me,
of that i am sure,
because when i meet these eyes
I can see
that the searching in them remains
but despite
all of this
i find the city to be beautiful

i enjoy it here
and i think i will do just that
for some time to come

 

how are you
getting along
with your city
with your days?

my last months
been kind of like a kaleidoscopic
carnevalic caravanic
cavalcade

lately,
so much city
so much car
so little whisper

i need a hand on my back
or a mountain
or a river, where a sea flows
or a sea, where a ball flows
and the ball is round
but not round like a ball
it‘s round like a sea
and in every tree, sap flows

in every tree
there is a sea

when the trees are flowing
the sap turns into a fountain
and somewhere,
there is a mountain
where an arc from ancient times
is supposed to have been found
and today,
i have found a now
were a me
is supposed to be
and this me is i
and i am now
and now is not today
because in front of today
is something bigger
than today,
and that is i
and i
have one i
that lives
and one i
that only survives

i also have a liver
that is living
in me
in i
and i
believe
that there are tears shed
in every sea

and i believe
that there is a thread
threaded between every tree
and that there is a sun
in every sea
and today
i can see a sun that shines

and i believe
that there is a moon
reflecting today
and that there is an i
reflecting the sun
in every sea

and you know,
i have one chair
to sit on
and one chair to
stand on and one bed
to rest in and
when i rest i
rest below the reflection
from the moon
from today

i want to jump
high
so that i
can hang
in trees
in threads
in me
in the morning
in the evening
in a space
where there is space
for all that will be
all that was
all that is
today

i want to jump rope
on a planet,
a planet kind of like this one
but a little smaller
a little bigger

i often hope that i
and you
will learn to swim
around the planet and run
through the atmosphere
through the world
to a cloud resting
on a field
leaning towards a tree,
and drinking the sap from
the same tree

between every city
there is a me
and where there is me
there is you
and since i am today
then you are today as well,
but squared -
endeared

this is why i
can calculate your radius
by multiplying myself
with every me
and you
with every day

i can calculate
your volume
by inhaling deeply
and then releasing -
reliefing

sometimes i see
everything so clearly
that i become a star,
a mother

if there was no me
then you would be
anyway
but you
would be someone else
in every way

if there was no me
i would not be able to dance
not eat
but there would still be a me
in the guise of an unme
and unme would be unhere
this unday
and this unday i would try to find unyou
and unwe would jump
with unease
down into a boat
and in the boat we would unrow
on a lake sinking
into a song singing
its own song

songs singing
on lakes sinking
giving sap
to seas
and threads
to trees
and giving mankind a machine that would demolish every machine and then do the same to itself so that there would no longer be any machines and this would give mankind such a relief that she never again would even think about ever creating another machine and would devote herself instead to start thinking of the sea of sap of
today
of the threads threaded
between the trees and the sea
in the river flowing
in and around every tree threaded
by thread to other trees
to today
and today i will run
on a tongue stung
by a bee
who wanted to be
on another planet,
a planet not at all like this one

the planet notatalllikethisone
is far away

it is yellow
it is good
it stands firmly
on two legs

it often goes for a walk
when it feels like going for a walk
and when it feels like sleeping
it does so
that the heavy trees fall
to the ground and in the fall
the leaves fall
off the trees

i am quite heavy when compared to uni,
he weighs practically nothing
just an ounce or so -
just enough for me to say
that he weighs practically nothing

practically
is the last name of uni

practically has been around
for more than one
thousand generations
and practically is still here
this day
like dismay
from an unday

by the way,
I believe
that as soon as we say
that we are there
we have left
there

i like leaving things
behind
in front
and then i like to pick things
to go out in to the forest and pick words
can be a pleasant activity
on a sunny day

to sweep the hand
along the earth
and pick all the words
that have experienced birth
and then put these words in a basket and take the basket home and put the basket on a shelf but before i put the basket on the shelf it might be wise to take all the words out that have experienced birth in the earth of the forest and do something with them perhaps lay a earth-birth-forest-puzzle of ten thousand pieces which could for example be done on a weekend when I feel like staying home the whole day two whole day even three whole days just because there has been so much going on lately that it kind of feels so much better to just stay home and lay a puzzle with the words of earth-birth that it just doesn’t matter very much that the puzzle has as many as ten thousand pieces it could have one hundred thousand pieces for all that i know,
it simply doesn’t matter
very much

 

i have some good friends
that can lay puzzles
of one hundred thousand pieces
and they do it quickly,
about as long as it takes for you and me
to brush our teeth
perhaps quicker even if,
in this comparison,
instead of you and me,
we would refer
to someone, who at the time of comparison, finds him or herself in a phase of his or her life where he or she feels forced to redirect a big part of the energy which is usually directed towards his or her oral hygiene to not start thinking the thought “i think i‘m going crazy” as a consequence to the repeated attempts in the last four days to resist the temptation to scratch an eczema which itches more than two eczema

 

i have never had an eczema
but i can imagine that this phenomenon
is of great inconvenience
to the person affected

i have, however,
gotten an ex
two ex
even three ex
tremely pleasant qualities

 

the first one is to row
the second is to grow
the third one is to believe
in trees,
in threads threaded
between the trees,
in the sap of the trees
and in the sap of this day
and in this day
which is growing
flowing
in the sea
of the river
of the free

what do you believe?

do you believe
in me?

where do you live?

do you live
in me?

i
live here
in my new city
my new here

i moved into my new here
a couple of days ago
and it is very nice,
my new here

in total
we are about twenty people
in the house
and those that i have met so far
have seemed sweet -
kind of like butterflies
with extra butter

the room is big,
large
and extremely okey
and the house is big, alive
and equally extremely
ok

and the streets breathe, they move
and the people on the streets move
as well
both in the world outer and inner
and in the room
grow
since yesterday
two green, friendly plants
and yesterday i received my mattress

it is soft, but not too soft,
one of those mattresses
that you sleep very well on,
you know,
the magic sleep,
the electrical sleep

a desk and chair have also found their place
and today i bought a basketball
and yesterday i found an electrical typewriter
and now i‘m hunting a cord
for the typewriter
and if it
will wake
up
i will from
now on write
more letters on
paper and
less letters with
digits

do you have a postal address?
what is it? where
is it?

i like it so much here
in my new town
so very much here
in my new now

l’m looking forward to,
once all is settled,
sit down and write
every word that i want
to write
and i have gotten myself a pair of speakers and a recording device
and with this i will record
and device
and rerecord
and redevice
sound.

i slept well last night.
it felt very good.
very much

lately i have been through
so very much.

so many places
so many human
beings so now i want to sit
down
and look
out
create
for
digest
with
work
out
the body
is beat
needs attenti
on

yesterday i wanted to kiss you twice

once on your stomach and once on your upper arm
and then i wanted to lay
down
and lay
my hand
on your shoulder and close my eyes
and that is what i did
in thought
and it soothed me

if you ever want to come here,
you are welcome.

it would be delicious.

just give me a shout
or a whisper.

now i‘m searching for a shelf
to put clothes
on
and I’m still searching a cord
to
the typewriter
which
is electrical
and a cheap sofa
to
rest on and to
be put
in
the corner of the room
next
to the window
to
read
on
and a shoerack
for
my shoes and my daughter‘s
shoes
and then a lamp
for
the light
or
two even and then everything should be done,
then i would live here
for real,
even more
for
real
than now

and you
do you live for real
or are you
just pretending?

i would really like for you to come and visit

would really like to see you
but not in the old city

here

and not with fear
just you and me

just for a little while
a few days perhaps

you can stay at a hotel
or on the street
or in my place
it doesn‘t matter
you‘re welcome in every possible way
and impossible
is never
and nothing

how do you look, by the way?
i look good, by the way.

i dreamt of you last night
again
and i believe that my dreams are trying to tell me something
and i believe it might be that i need to meet you
and just be
with you
for just a few days
or so

let me know
if that is also what you
want

and you,
i just have to tell you something:

i have to say wow.

wow,
i like life
so very much

i give a hug
to you

and please hug all the kids
from me

they are so beautiful,
the children.

today i went running in the park
there i saw whisperwhite willows
swarming around cloudy pillows
and birds flying and birds falling

and nowadays
most things in my life
move slowly

nowadays
i move slowly

look out through the window
take
a walk

eat lunch.

come home and look out
through the window

sit.

sleep.

and notice
how much start to happen
when things move slowly.

now
things are still
moving slowly.

wake up.

look.

window.

listen
to music
and notice
how much music there is in music
when things move slowly

and i notice
how much i don‘t eat
when things move slowly

when i move slowly
i notice
that others take notice
of me
for moving slowly

when i move slowly
i notice
that my body likes
when things move slowly

when my body likes what i do
with it
i notice
that everything really moves
quite slowly.

when i talk slowly
i notice
that others understand better
what i have to say
in case they haven‘t fallen asleep before i have come to the point when everything that i had to say has been said

when others understand better what it is that i am trying to say
i understand better what it is that i am trying to say

when things move slowly
i stay for long in the same place
and i don‘t bother so much to think of
whether there is another place
that might be better

when things move slowly
i see that the sounds of the city
are very high

i see that the houses of the city
are very high

i see that the light from the sun
want
us
well

i see that every choice
contains an inherent beauty
which can be seen
on the top floor
of my dreams

when i move slowly
i understand
that i will have a long life

i will become
about one hundred and thirty
five years old
and it feels very good
that i have so many years to look forward to,
that i haven‘t even lived one fourth of my life
and yet i can do so much.

i can read
run
calculate
analyze
embrace
kiss
touch
hurt
forgive
disappear
change
change
wonder
enjoy
the wonderful
the wonders
of every day
of every being
and i can climb
and love
my child
make her laugh
grow.

all of this
and i haven‘t even lived one fourth of all my years
in one of my many lives

what can you do?

can you hear?
what i’m trying to say?

in the coming weeks i will receive many visitors
and i look forward
to.

i have actually kind of grown
a little tired of all these new acquaintances
introductions
presentations, of me
attempts
to answer the question:
who is me?

i find this question to
be very difficult to
answer

i prefer to
just look
and be looked at
listen
and be listened to
touch
and be touched by

it‘s usually easier that way,
for me,
to understand
to find
the answer to this question
which is so very difficult
to question

you,
how are you
now?

how is your brain
and heart
blood
and body?

i have decided to find one thousand tulips
and hand them to your hand

today
is the day when everything will change!

i can feel it

of course,
every day is such a day
but nonetheless,
i nevertheless
feel
that this deserves to be celebrated
applauded
standingly ovated

or what do you say,
my dear friend
and fellow time and space
traveller

if you want
i can tell you shortly about shifting elements
and uneven surfaces

yes?
okey.

today i walked on sidewalk
and then i walked
on another side of the sidewalk
and then i had to decide
whether to recide
recede
receive
or recite
and i chose neither

instead
i took off my shoes
and walked with my bare
feet

on grass
on gravel
on sand
on water
and it felt good

the feet had been longing
for very, very long -
longlonging,
so to say

then i went to a pool
and jumped in the water
because there was water
in the pool

and suddenly the city changed

everything happened really fast
kind of like a car crash
when everything changed
when water embraced
my body instead
of air

today you were circulating quite ovally inside of me.

i saw something that i had not before seen
and that which i saw
gave me a pleasant emotion

does it ever happen
that also you
sometime wonder
if god has a hat
on head?

i don‘t think god has a hat
on head

i don‘t think god has head
to have hat on

but god,
i believe,
has a skin
to touch

god has a ground
to stand

god has two legs
to stand

god has a skin
naked

now is god
awakened

are you awakened?
or are you sleeping?
or don‘t you care?
about sleeping?

right now i‘m taking a walk in the middle of the night

and now i sit down on the sidewalk
on the wrong side of it
and now i hear
from above
a woman very much enjoying
what i believe is an act of intimation

she groans
i listen
and some bypassers do the same
listen, that is,
they don’t groan
but they laugh a little
and then they keep on bypassing
but i don‘t -
i stay

her groaning sounds nice
i find

now i head home
and my head, my dome
is tired
so i sleep

now a friend calls and want me to open
and now i walk down the stairs to open
and i open
and my friend says
“i thought you were sleeping”
and i say
“i was,
but don’t worry about it,
please enter”
and my friend enters
and gives me a hug

now it is morning and i leave
and now i arrive
to a new city
a capital

now i need vitamine c
so i buy orange juice
for thirty five
and now i calculate
that it takes the women
on the nepalese rice fields
three days
to earn enough money
to buy an orange juice
in this new capital

now i’m thinking about me,
the cell
and now i’m thinking
about the more than fifty billion cells
living in me, the cell
being in me
being me

and now i’m thinking about
how these fifty billion cells in me breathe
move
work
rest
drink
eat
communicate
with their fellow cells
and now i’m thinking of me, the cell
and how i breathe
move
work
rest
drink
eat
communicate
with my fellow woman
and man
and now the thunder begins to thunder
and the lightning to lighten
and the rain to rain
and the storm to make
the people run
or hide
or buy an orange, apple, banana, nectarine
and eat all these fruits

that is what i do
because i don‘t like running from storms
and neither do i like hiding
from them

now i hop on a bus and travel through woods
and after a few hours end up
in the old city

now i meet my colleagues and we discuss
how to slay the monster
and after that,
how we will make the world go sane

now i see my friends
who i haven‘t seen for long
and it‘s very nice
for a few hours

now i swim in a cold lake
which doesn‘t feel that cold after all
and now i fall asleep in the forest
and now i swim in another cold lake
which doesn‘t feel that cold
either
after all

now i make some people happy
and now i make some other people angry
and now i say
that it‘s probably for the better
anyway

it usually goes that way

now i run in the forest and i run fast
and a rottweiler runs behind
faster
and jumps high
this dog
and bites
me
and i turn around and i am going to kick
it
but now the dog is quiet
steps back
a little scared i think
because that is how people usually behave when they are scared

they become quiet
and take a step back

so i decide not to kick
anything
anydog

instead i write
to you
and now
i want to hold you
but i can‘t
so instead i write
to you

and now i no longer want to be in the city
so i go out in the forest
and here i find
a pause
a peace
a quiet
a boat
two oars
cloudberry
a badger
a moose
a fox
mountain
riverripple
twelve degree water
a swim
in twelve waters
chess
a big lake
chirping
waves
mint
oregano
a cabin
two longing
bright day
bright night
bridge
a thanks
that you exist
and one more thank
for existing so very, very well

now i think
that things should be taken
from those who have
and don‘t need

from those that have
taken for thousands of y
ears

from those who have
pulling and pushing those who don‘t have
wherever they want
as they want
trying to break their mind
by taking their time
thought
life
like were they
nothing more than
cattle

things should be given
to those who don‘t have
and need
and we
need to work
against the system
that has turned man into merchandise

work for the transition
from man the machine
to man
the miracle

transition
from hard life
to live life

from mind in cage
to mind engaged
with peace
instead of rage

and now i give you
a soft kiss on your hand
and if you want
another soft kiss
on your other hand

how many hands do you have?
i have two
but would like
to have more

today i saw a wonderful film

i didn‘t see all of it
but it was wonderful
anyway

i like it here
i like you

sometimes it feels like
i see you
even though i don‘t
see you

feels like i am with you
even though you‘re not
with me

like i know who you are
without knowing
who you are

sometimes in dream want i
touch
you
skin

meeting you
has done something to me

tonight i will become a star
i will lie down
somewhere between the sun
and alpha centauri

if you want
you can look at me up there
and if you want
you can think about whether or not
the downfall of this system
is an inevitability
and if the revolution is our possibility
to give the earth
the wild
the human
being
freedom

perhaps you didn‘t know this
but i have a cranium
made out of nickel and cadmium
and i usually use plenty of cardamom
instead of cinammon

about as much as there is nickel and cadmium
in my accumulating cranium
where there is a faucet
out of which runs
words and world of water
and when it sometimes runs
over
i like to relax
so that my nickel-cadmium-accumulator
in my crumbling cardamom-cranium
stops accumulating
anymore ms and cs and squared
you know,
like in that famous equation

and when the faucet doesn‘t run well
enough
i like to put them to work
and with them
i mean they, those, that have made me
that are working in me
on me
for me
and i try my best
to keep unemployment down
because low levels
keep salaries high
keep supply and demand
in equilibrium
in delirium
in my cranium
made of nickel and cadmium
so that they
who have created me
and keep creating me
are working
together
for me
in me
on me
in order to make me
feel
well
and i feel so well
everything feels so very well
when those in me are working
together

i want to know
what is not
your occupation?

and now i am going to be honest and say
that something has happened to me
lately

something changed

something heavy came
into my i

part of me feels somewhere else

feels small
less whole
feels soul-
sick

i have seen this heavy before
and that time it became heavier
became a bit too heavy
for it to be fun
anymore

i have an angel who wants to fly
with me

she is herenow
and i want to fly
and i feel
right now that i need to let go of this heavy
in order for the wings
to bear

but i‘m not sure of how to let go of this heavy

this heavy has made me a bit confused

at this moment i‘m not really capable of making an adequate estimation of the lucidity
of my thinking
but the thoughts that i can
identify
are saying that the thoughts to
of and around
you
out there
in front of my letters,
these thoughts are saying
that thinking of you is rather heavy
and need to lose weight
in order for me
to be able
to fly

i‘m not exactly sure what that means
but i needed to say it anyway
because my angel
is waiting
for me
and now i embrace
you
and i embrace
me

by the way, do you like embracing?
or do you prefer ice-cream?

now it is one month ago
since i wrote ice-cream?

and for a while there
i thought it would end there

but now i‘m back
and i hope that you are still here,

are you that?
are you here?
are my words still dear
to you?

yes?
yes.

it pleases me that you are still here
that still my words are dear
because i would really like to tell
you
that this the lastest month of my life
has been closer to beyond descripition
than any other month in my life

it feels like i‘ve been flying
up,
and flying upper
and even upper
and even my sleep
has been up there
up up,
so very, very
up there
so very, very
up here

i haven‘t been thinking very much of you
this last month
but when i recently sat down by my window
breathing nightair
i sensed
that the lack of thoughts
had just been replaced by an energy
that has been born in the joy
of meeting you
and perhaps,
i then thought,
it’s possible that these thoughts
and this energy
are poles apart
for a reason
as keepers
of a balance
which means that they
at any given point in time
can‘t coexist
in the same space
in the same time

anyway,
those thoughts that less than one hour ago
poured down my spine
created a wish
a desire
to recall the times
that we have spent
together

these times that you
and your eyes
have read me
and my letters

when the images of these times
were opening up to me
i understood why i
have felt like i
have felt

those these seconds
those these minutes, hours
those these days
that we have spent together,
when being recalled,
i can see
that they are surrounded
by a shimmer,
glowing

warming

thank you.

Read more:

Rays of Time and Two pieces of Applesky - part 2

Raining Jewels - part 3

 

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